Springtime is for Haters

It seems, every year, a rash of people (friends, friends-of-friends, colleagues) break up in February and March. Sometimes it's the May-December romance that simply went on too long, sometimes it's people who've been together 5 years or more. This annual purge strikes all types, wreaking havoc and driving thousands to drink. I'm convinced this massive love-cull funds bars and clubs until November, when some rush to reconcile and others hunker down with a new beau for the cold months.

What causes this outbreak? Is it cabin fever gone wrong? Is it Seasonal Affective Disorder running rampant and misguided? Where's the breakdown causing all the breakups in town?

On a daily basis my Newsfeed informs me of another awkward move from "In A Relationship" to "It's Complicated". It seems endless this time of year. Spring cleaning, or something like it. Is it a cold-climate thing? When buds creep from branches do chemicals surge, inspiring once-happy couples to look elsewhere? Do these people turn to the person they've been cooped-up with and say "What was I thinking?!" It makes me wonder when Los Angelites break up. Without seasonal cues perhaps they float, year-round, in a happy haze of love and sexual satisfaction. It's a mystery some Ivy Leaguer must be researching.

However selfish it may be, hearing of these devastating separations makes me feel particularly satisfied by my own relationship. I'm entirely happy sailing along, a steady heart beat, no major spikes of drama, no dips into the dramatic, no seasonal shifts. Those days are long gone, thankfully, and my Newsfeed remains beautifully uncomplicated.